Saturday 12 September 2009

Feelings when i am reaching UK.....

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Da 1st day when i reach Newcastle, S is leaving now to stay in the homestay!
Well, although i knew it, but when she is leaving i feel kinda sad! And also the
feeling is just in time to appear at da time! Gosh.......
My heart is like press by the stone, i feel suffer! BREATHLESS!
I didn't have chance to walk in and even say Hello to her guardian since
Shirly said, let's go~ i feel bad about that, i don't know what should i answer at
that time, should i say, wait? (cause S don't even got a number, i can't call her!
And i don't know whether she is good over there or not!)or i should go in her house and have a tea 1st? its blank inside my mind, and i just sit back into the car~

Shirly drove away, then she said, everything was changed!
Tears, is rolling inside my eyes~ i feel bad! why everyone is Gone?
After i reach home, i saw Peony! She said she is happy cause finally i've back,
She is not more alone in da house~ But for me......i am still alone!
Cause S is not with me, and P is not back yet!
I feel a bit comfort cause P is coming back, and also i got P to talk to!
However, who knows~ P is back..................

Wuhoo, should i be happy with that? The answer is NO!!!
Although P is back, her cousin is with her. Of course i welcoming them to stay here
but P never care about us! She is busy? busy with her cousin!
Well......or i should never care about that? i feel disappoint ....
Now, its real! Everything is changed~ my flatmates, only foods never changed

Day after day, i feel its grow more conflicts!
May be we know but we never say it out~
However, i don't really like to make more conflicts so i am hiding it. try to tolerance hope it might bring peace~

Now, i actually feel that, i need to grow up!
I don't really need to care much, what's the point to teach other?
I have no right to do that! Also, others never listen to you as well
So now, i am trying to bear and i know God will lead me!
thank you Lord who puts someone beside me, which i can asked for help
and talk to when i am mad......he can pull me down!
I believe i can do better after that!

Thanks God for his Love which endures forever.